Things you should not do:
1. Down 3 glass of wine in a short period of time at a networking function when you have not eaten in over 4 hours. Particularly when function is being held at bar that does not serve food.
2. Go to McDonalds when you have already drank your Weight Watchers points away at Swank Chicago.
3. Tell the guy in front of McDonalds to fuck off when he keeps pestering you to buy a copy of Streetwise.
4. Tell your friend you will meet her at The District after said networking function even though you should be going home to sleep because you are wicked tired and you have to be at work extra early (7:30am) to hand out Valentines cards and cups of candy because you are member of the Fish Committee (Employee Spirits).
5. Run across the street and jump in front of CTA Bus screaming: “Stop in the Name of Love.”