Catch 22

It has been a full week since Airport Guy left so I have had a lot of time for reflection on how things went during the time that he was here. The jaded side of me thinks it was a complete disaster. Heck, if you stopped by my blog last Saturday night, you might even have read a post which I have since withdrawn saying that he wasn’t the one.
However, the optimistic side in me thinks that things weren’t so bad. We did manage to have quite a bit of fun together. Plus, what relationship is perfect right? I think a lot of it had to do with the fact that we are still getting to know each other and we didn’t really discuss each other’s expectations for the trip. Plus when you spend 24/7 together for days on end, one is bound to get a bit irritable, especially if one is visited by their monthly special friend.
So where do things stand now? Well, we are making plans to see each other in the summer, maybe even before then. Ultimately, any future together will require one of us to move and I don’t think we know each other well enough to make that sort of decision. However, that’s unlikely to happen if we keep living so far apart. So it’s a real catch 22.
In the meantime, I need to work on developing my social network here in London as I still don’t have any confidants. Yeah, I know quite a few people now and have a few friends but no one; I’d trust my life with. Sort of sad, but true. But I think I need to try a bit harder — be a bit more trusting because I think the days of me relying on my best guy friend for advice need to be over. I mean, he lives over 4000 miles away and surely after all this time, I should be able to find someone closer to home.
2 Comments
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March 6, 2007 at 10:40 pm
Ursula
Thanks for the feedback. I am totally conflicted by the whole situation. Based on past experiences, I just want to run. However, trying not to let that cloud my judgement. More importantly, trying to rely on my head and not my heart to lead me astray.
March 6, 2007 at 1:17 am
Shasta MacNasty
You didn’t ask for it, but I’m giving it to you anyway: Whatever you do, trust your instincts. You’re a grown woman with lots of experience with making good, and not-so-good decisions. 🙂
Moving on, long-distance relationships are tough. And I would agree, that if you want anything long-term it’s going to require the two of you being in the same place. But as you said, you guys are still trying to get to know each other, so continue doing that, trust your instincts, and as you mentioned a couple posts above…be true to yourself and what you want. Hmm…that top five is very insightful.