September 2006 Archives

For some time, I have wanted to redesign my blog with a more professional look. Particularly since I use my real name and more and more people from my real world life are finding my blog. I did think about trying to do the redesign myself, but in that I'm a novice at html, I thought I'd better leave it to the professionals.

However, after searching around for quite some time, I couldn't decide on whom to use for the redesign. Prices for blog design are quite varied and even after looking at the portfolios, I wasn't really sure that I'd be getting good value for my money. So one night while chatting to George via IM, I asked him if he knew anyone that did blog design. He referred me to two people, one of whom I ended up using. And based on the result, let me say that I'm super duper pleased. So for anyone out there looking to set up a new blog or redesign an existing blog, I highly recommend Code 718. The price charged is extremely competitive and the designer listened to my needs and was quite responsive throughout the whole process.

Being in Paris last week was amazing. Thus, it’s a shame that I took so long to visit after moving to London. I had planned on it being the first European city I visited, however, when Racquetball Guy decided not to take the job in France, I just couldn't bring myself to go there quite yet. Plus I was content to go elsewhere until I got my emotions in check. But after last week, I can say resoundingly that I was quite foolish to wait so long to visit. Particularly since it’s very easy to get to Paris via train from London, plus during the entire time I was there, I did not even think once about Racquetball Guy. I think I didn’t think about him, as I was with other people for some of the time, plus much to my surprise, I was hit on by the opposite sex quite regularly. More imporantly, I think I know I am so over him!

Day 1
I take the 5:45 Eurostar train to Paris from London Waterloo which takes a mere 2 ½ hours. And after taking a taxi to my hotel, I quickly drop off my luggage and walk down to the Eiffel Tower. It's simply stunning and I badly want to go up but I decide to wait until the morning. I wanted to see Paris properly. So I walk around enjoying the lively atmosphere and take pictures. And while standing directly beneath the Eiffel Tower, I was hit on by this French guy. At first, I didn’t realize that he was being flirtatious. Men hardly ever hit on me. Plus on my travels, I often have friendly banter with people that I meet but nothing every really comes of it. However, this guy kept close at hand for a good 30 minutes, asking me all these questions about myself and kept asking me to go for a drink. I probably would have gone had I thought a drink was all he was after. But he was so aggressive and started being quite suggestive, that I thought it best just to chase him off.

Day 2
I wake bright and early and walk down to a nearby café for a quick breakfast and then walk back to the Eiffel Tower. I wanted to get there early so as to be one of the first in line to go up. Once there, I only had about 15minutes to wait. I engage in a lively chat with an older American woman who was in London when the last terror alert happened.

In the elevator going up, I started getting nervous. Particularly as the ride was not smooth and I suddenly realized that the Eiffel Tower is quite tall. In fact, it is 1063 feet tall. This is roughly the same height as the John Hancock Building in Chicago which has 100 floors all enclosed. Once at the 2nd floor, I get off and walk around. The view is breathtaking. I then get on another elevator to the 3rd floor where the view is even more spectacular. I grin from ear to ear and spend about an hour looking at the various buildings across the city. As it was getting windy, I head back down to the 2nd floor, where overcome with positive energy, I decide to take the stairs. Big mistake. I start having a slight panic attack. I mean, the second floor is still really high (376 feet) and I can see the ground beneath me. Now I know it’s a sturdy structure, but I couldn’t help get a bit panicky. I was still a good 20/30 floors up. However, I keep it all in check as there are other people on the stairways with me.

Once back down, I marvel and the structure and walk towards the Hotel des Invalides. Apparently is was commissioned by Louis XIV in 1670 to house wounded and homeless veterans. Within the Hotel des Invalides complex, is the Musee de L’Armee. I spent a bit of time there exploring the vast military collection. I then went on to visit the Dome Church which is now the resting place for Napoleon in a massive crypt, encased with six coffins.

Since the lunch hour was approaching and I had to get back for my company meeting, I then head back to the hotel and change into business attire. I get there just in time to have a proper three course French meal. The rest of day was spent listening to one presentation after another. Then around 6pm, I go back to my room and change yet again in preparation for evening cruise and dinner down the River Seine.

Day 3
I wake early again. Mainly because it is the weekend and now that business meeting is over, I decided to switch hotels to a different part of town. So I check out of the Hilton Hotel and check in to the Le Meridien just off the Champs-Elysees. I then resist the urge to take a cab and get on the metro train to Notre Dame. The cathedral is quite beautiful, however having visited a number across Europe, I was a little underwhelmed. That said, after huffing and puffing my way to the top via some narrow steps, I was rewarded with yet another spectacular view of the city. Plus I got to see up close some of the wonderful gargoyles I’ve come to associate with Notre Dame.

Once back down, I visit Sainte-Chapelle another architectural masterpiece built for the French royal family. It forms part of the Palais de Justice and so I had to go through a proper screening. I felt like I was at the airport. That said, I was rewarded by some of the most magnificent stained glass windows I’ve ever seen. Apparently the 15 windows display more than 1000 biblical scenes. From there, I head next door to Conciergerie. During the height of the French revolution it housed more than 4000 prisoners. In fact, Marie-Antoinette, was held there in a tiny cell until her execution.

After a morning of high culture, I decide to head back towards the Champs-Elysees for some shopping. Once there, I had this sudden urge to shop for jewelry. I couldn’t find anything that moved me to purchase, so ended up asking one of the nearby hotel concierges for address of the nearest Tiffany store. He directed me away from the Champs-Elysees back towards the Opera House where on a nearby Street, Rue De La Paix, I came face to face with all the major jewelry designers. I nervously step into Tiffany where I immediately pick out a bracelet for purchase.

I then head back to the hotel, where I quickly showered and changed in preparation to meet up with a work colleague as we made plans the night before to see Moulin Rouge. Unfortunately even with the aid of the Hilton Hotel concierge, we didn’t end up with tickets. So just had a lovely dinner at Le Verre Bouteille Ternes Restaurant.

Day 4
It is my final day in Paris. I had planned to go to a flea market, but as I blew the budget on jewelry, I decide to sleep in. Around noon, I head to the Louvre Museum where I then spent the next 4 hours. As I mentioned in an earlier post about the Mona Lisa, the Lourve Museum, bar none, is the best museum I’ve ever visited. Thus, on my next trip to Paris, I’ll definitely be spending more time there.

From there, I walk several miles up the Champ-Elysees straight toward the Arc de Triomphe. Apparently it was commissed by Napoleon in celebration of his greatest victory, the Battle of Austerlitz. Once there, I decide to take yet another set of narrow staircase up to the top. Yet again, I was rewarded with another splendid view of Paris. I spent a half hour taking it all in, bummed that my trip is coming to an end. I then head back to the hotel and have dinner at the nearby Bellagio Restaurant. I then take a cab to the Gare du Nord train station for the short journey home. I can't wait to go back.

While in Paris last weekend, I spend 4 hours at the Louvre Museum. I actually wanted to spend more time there as it is by far the most impressive museum I have ever visited. However I was suffering from sensory overload, so I thought it best to move on and come back another time.

In any event, while there, one of the first paintings I took notice of was Leonardo da Vinci masterpiece Mona Lisa. I actually visited the painting at 3 different times as upon initial inspection, I was a bit disappointed and a bit perplexed as to why some have considered it the most important painting in Western art history. Don't get me wrong, the Mona Lisa is a stunning painting. However, the painting is small and the woman featured is not a classic beauty. In fact, she looks a bit masculine with those weird hands. Yes she has an enigmatic smile that is quite captivating, but that still doesn’t explain the hype around this painting. Maybe the fame has more to do with the paintings complicated history -- it has been stolen and moved around quite a few times. Whatever the case, I think that there are much more wonderful paintings to marvel at in the Louvre and other museums elsewhere in the world. That said, the Mona Lisa is still an attractive painting and if recent reports are to be believed, the model might have been "pregnant or had recently given birth."

Maybe she should be called the Mama Lisa
3-D scan of `Mona Lisa' reveals a garment worn by pregnant women, or those who'd just given birth

By Angela Doland, Associated Press, Published September 28, 2006

PARIS -- Researchers studying 3-D images of the "Mona Lisa" say she probably was pregnant or had recently given birth when she sat for Leonardo da Vinci's 16th Century masterpiece. The clue was something she wore.

Scans turned up evidence of a fine gauzy veil or robe, a garment women of the Italian Renaissance wore when they were pregnant or were new mothers, a leading French museum researcher, Michel Menu, said in an interview Wednesday.

As the painting aged, the robe darkened. The thick, dark varnish on the work and decades of grime made it hard even to know what color her dress is; it has been described as black, brown and green. A piece of fabric draped on her shoulder was sometimes interpreted as a shawl or a scarf.

But images obtained from infrared reflectography tell a different story. The veil, called a guarnello, is transparent, and it looks similar to a gauzy garment in Sandro Botticelli's "Portrait of a Lady," depicting a pregnant woman with her hand over her stomach.

Interesting video produced by the ACLU in an effort to alert people to the amount of data currently being collected by various corporate entities and the US government.

The government and corporations are aggressively collecting information about your personal life and your habits. They want to track your purchases, your medical records, and even your relationships. The Bush Administration's policies, coupled with invasive new technologies, could eliminate your right to privacy completely. Please help us protect our privacy rights and prevent the Total Surveillance Society.

A picture of the Eiffel Tower taken on a boat ride down the Seine River.

I arrived safely in Paris a few hours ago and I already want to move here. The city is beautiful and the men love me! Well at the least this French guy I met under the Eiffel Tower. Now granted he was a little too aggressive for me, but I found the attention quite flattering even if in the end I had to chase him off...

I'm not a fashionista, so I normally don't pay attention to Fashion Week. However because of the controversy surrounding size zero models walking the catwalks this week in London, I have been paying attention. Mostly to see for myself what all the fuss is about. And from the pictures I’ve seen so far, let me just say that I’m shocked at the thinness of some of the models. Goodness! Some look like famine refugees. Now, I'm not hating on models for being skinny. Heck, I'm currently in the middle of a struggle to get rid of some of the weight I gained since I moved over here. That said, I don't want to be that thin or look so fragile that God forbid a strong wind blow through I might keel over. Mainly because it is not healthy, sexy or even attractive to look like a lollipop. Well at least not to me anyway. So while I don't think that designers should be forced to use a certain type of model, something needs to be done to encourage a much healthier look. So hats off to Milan and Madrid for banning zero size models.

In less than 24 hours I'll be in Paris for the first time. And the fact that I'm going alone, is no longer dampening my excitement. Truth be told, I won't be alone exactly. The first part of the trip is for business, but the latter part is pure pleasure. As such, I'm so excited I almost don't know what to do with myself. Hopefully the excitement doesn't cause me to forget any of the French phrases I've been practicing. More importantly, here's hoping the Paris lives up to my expectations.

When I first decided not to the perm again my hair some years ago, I did so manly because I was fed up with the cost of going to get my hair done every two weeks. Plus no matter how mild the perm was, I'd always end up with burns to my scalp. So natural it was. Well really braiding it was. Now five years later with one misstep that had me starting over two years ago (I got it straighten with a hot comb and some didn't snap back), I'm pleased with the look, feel, thickness and length of my hair.

By the way, I actually did the braiding myself. It took about 3 hours.

London has amazing architecture. However, after 16+ months here, it has sort of faded into the background. However, with a new camera in hand (Canon IXUS 800 IS), I decided to take pictures of the walk from my office near St. Paul's Cathederal up to the Gherkin Building and then back along to Thames River to the London Eye just past Waterloo Station. I view these pictures as proof as to why London is definitely one of the best places to live in the world. I mean, very few cities have such a wonderful blend of old and new architecture.

I have become the cat lady. I ask people about their spouses, children, etc. They ask me about my jet setting pampered pooch, Choo-Choo who has discovered and now demands as part of his evening meal, crack for cats, Purina Gourmet Pearl.

At approximately £5 ($9.38US) for a package of 12 pouches, this stuff is not cheap. Lucky for him, I have a generous heart. Plus the whining I have to listen to if he doesn't get it is almost too much to bear.

It should be noted that I only starting buying this brand after the cheaper stuff that he use to like, was out of stock. Now, I can't get him to backtrack. Oh well! I suppose I could have worst problems.

I have never had to deal with a one minute man, but it is good to know that should I meet my Prince who is perfect in every way expect the bedroom that there is a drug out there to help improve his performance.

Pill that prolongs the joy of sex
By Lewis Smith, The Times, September 08, 2006

The first drug for treating premature ejaculation has been successfully tested in the US.

IN THE Woody Allen film Play It Again, Sam, the technique used was to think of the names of famous baseball stars, whereas some sexologists recommend the more mechanical “stop, start, squeeze” method.

Now scientists may have come up with the first pharmaceutical means of tackling premature ejaculation — using a class of drug usually associated with treating depression.

In trials involving 2,600 men, researchers in the US have shown that a new drug could prolong sexual intercourse by more than three times the duration previously experienced.

If approved after more tests, the drug will be the first designed to tackle the problem, which is experienced by 20-30 per cent of men.

Participants in the trial typically concluded intercourse in less than a minute. Speed may be desirable in a racing pigeon or a sports car, but in sex the laurels tend to be won by the slow.

A “normal” time between penetration and climax, the drug manufacturers Johnson & Johnson discovered, with the aid of obliging couples and a stopwatch, is 7.3 minutes.

Ok! Maybe not.

CNN star reporter/anchor Anderson Cooper at one point wanted to be a spy. That is totally hot!

Fay Weldon a feminist icon in the UK tells women in her latest book that if they want to be happy they need to fake orgasms then lavish praise on their partners. What the f*$k kind of advice is that? More importantly, isn't this backwards thinking from a feminist point of view? As such, I'm going to have to chalk this up as a publicity stunt to sell more books, because really, it does not serve a woman well if she is dishonest about the effect or lack thereof her partner is having on her in the bedroom. True, not every woman can achieve orgasm through sexual intercourse, but there are others ways and encouraging women not to have honest dialogue with their partner dooms any serious long term relationship.

'If you want to find true happiness, just fake it'
In her latest book, the feminist icon Fay Weldon has caused a sensation by turning the beliefs of the sisterhood upside down.
The Observer, Sunday September 3rd 2006, By Amelia Hill

Telling women not to expect orgasms but to fake them, and to praise their partner lavishly afterwards, is not advice normally associated with a woman who has been in the vanguard of feminism for four decades.
Nevertheless, Fay Weldon gives short shrift to the views for which feminists have fought so bitterly over the years. In her latest book, she not only warns high-flying women that they should expect to end up single, she also suggests that sexual pleasure may be incompatible with high-powered careers and that women should simply accept they are less capable of being happy than men.

'Eighty per cent of women only sometimes - or never - experience orgasm. Facts are facts and there we are. Deal with it,' she writes in What Makes Women Happy?, to be published this month by Fourth Estate.

According to Weldon, sensible members of the sisterhood should, therefore, follow the example so graphically set by the actor Meg Ryan in the 1989 movie When Harry Met Sally, and fake orgasms whenever necessary.

'If you are happy and generous-minded, you will fake it and then leap out of bed and pour him champagne, telling him, "You are so clever" or however you express enthusiasm,' she says. 'Faking is kind to male partners ... Otherwise they too may become anxious and so less able to perform. Do yourself and him a favour, sister: fake it.'

Weldon, who created the slogan 'Go to work on an egg' in her early years as an advertising copywriter, is seen as one of the England's most serious proto-feminists thanks to her novels, which include The Fat Woman's Joke, Female Friends and The Life and Loves of a She-Devil.

If not already in the works, some US network needs to buy the rights to Dragon's Den. It's one of the few reality type shows that I actually enjoy watching these days.

Dragons' Den If you've ever had an idea to make money, Dragons' Den is THE show to watch. All manner of money-spinning minds will step into the intimidating world of business financing, determined to make their dreams come true. All they need is the cash. To get this, they must face the Dragons, all of whom are formidable business thinkers with the money to make things happen.

But this is no lottery - the contestants will need all their powers of reasoning, presentation and persuasion to convince our five business experts that theirs is a product worth investing in. The Dragons know what makes a successful idea, how much it's worth and how much cash is needed to get it off the ground.

The Rules
Each business (pitcher) can pitch for a specified amount of funding for their idea or product.
If the pitcher can convince one or more of the Dragons to meet that specified amount (usually in exchange for shares of their company), the pitcher walks away with the cash.
If the pitchers find themselves short of the specified amount of funding, they lose it all.
Each pitcher is free to bargain with the Dragons in order to get the specified level of funding.

I moved to the UK over a year ago and have not really made an effort to see much of the country beyond London. Mainly because I wanted to use my vacation to explore cities like Barcelona, Prague, Amsterdam and Paris later this month. But will definitely have to make an effort in the New Year to visit some of the other major cities in the UK. Top of the list are Glasgow and Endinburgh, both in Scotland.

Glasgow is top tourist city destination in the UK
The Herald, William Tinning, September 6 2006
Glasgow was last night named as the UK's favourite tourist city destination in a survey by one of the world's most exclusive travel magazines.

The dear green place toppled last year's winner London, and leapfrogged its close rival Edinburgh, in snatching the title awarded by readers of Traveller, the US holiday guide for the rich and famous produced by Conde Nast.
It is the second time Glasgow has taken the top spot in the poll of readers who were asked to select their favourite UK city destination. London was ranked third this year.

Conde Nast said Glasgow had been singled out for its people and hospitality as well as its lively nightlife.
The city's attractions include free galleries and museums such as the city council-owned Kelvingrove Art Gallery and Museum, the most popular tourist attraction outside London, and the Burrell Collection of art.

Edinburgh was favoured for its safety and cleanliness.

Original link via Londonist.

If I had as much excitement in my life as fellow expat Naive London Girl, I am sure I would have a lot more blog readers. Of course, the prude in me wouldn't think of printing such matters, even if they were going on -- which they are not! God, my life is so boring. Of course, after all the drama with Racquetball Guy and various family members, I'm actually quite ok with my current quiet existence.

I have been in love with Keith Olbermann for a long time, and his recent response to Donald Rumsfeld’s speech to the American Legion has solidified my feelings even further. The fact is that Donald Rumnsfeld and most of the Bush Administration are in total denial about how the War on Terror has made the world at large a less safer place for future generations to come. And so to challenge people's dissent with automatic charge of disloyalty to their country is just plain out wrong.

Link uncovered via Blurbomat. For the full transcript of Keith's response, click below.

For those of you in Boston, I encourage you to attend a fundraiser for the Urban Scholars Program that what quite instrumental in my development during my High School years. Truth be told, had it not been for this program, I never would have thought about leaving Massachusetts for university. And that would have been a told travesty as my four years at the University of Michigan were without a doubt, some of the best years of my life.

D3B: Fashion Forward!' (3rd Annual Derrick's Birthday Bash) is a fashion/comedy show coordinated by the Duplessy Foundation that will raise $25,000 for the Alumni funds for the Urban Scholars Program and Summer Search Foundation in Boston. The event takes place on Thursday, September 21, 2006 at Nick’s Comedy Stop, 100 Warrenton St., Boston, MA.

This event will have a fashion show featuring 6 hot local fashion designers, a comedy show, and an online auction.

Sponsors for the show include companies from retail, fashion, comedy, and entertainment. Hosts include Channel 7’s Janet Wu and Dynamic Duo of Comedy, Corey Manning and Chris Tabb.

To purchase tickets, go here.

A few months ago, I started checked my horoscope almost on a daily basis. I suppose I'm looking for signs/clues that may aid my decision making process as I work towards achieving various personal and professional goals.

You scored as III - The Empress. The Empress is a maternal symbol. She is the mother figure who loves, nurtures and protects. She will protect you, she will always be there when you are in trouble. When you fall over and graze your knee, the Empress will kiss it better. Yet she is not a weak figure. Her compassion is strength. If her children are threatened she will stop at nothing to protect them. If well aspected in a Tarot spread, the Empress can symbolise security, protection and unconditional love. If badly aspected it can represent over-protectiveness, fear of risk taking and refusal to face the real world. III - The Empress 88% II - The High Priestess 75% X - Wheel of Fortune 69% XI: Justice 69% I - Magician 63% XIX: The Sun 63% XIII: Death 63% IV - The Emperor 63% XVI: The Tower 63% VIII - Strength 44% 0 - The Fool 44% VI: The Lovers 38% XV: The Devil 19% Which Major Arcana Tarot Card Are You? created with QuizFarm.com

Quiz via Khandi Does Chicago.

For all the men in my life that I like and admire, I hope you won't hold it against me that I've posted the chain email I received below. With that, I'm curious about my current readership. Long gone are the days when I use to get lots of comments and I'm starting to feel like I'm talking to myself. Or perhaps, no one in interested in my current blog topics. Either way, I'm in the midst of a Daria Morgendorffer moment. I don't really want to be popular, but you know, I'd still like to feel like I'm engaged in a two way dialogue with at least a few people. With that, I'm curious as to what people would like to know about me. So ask me anything. I just might answer in detail.

For all those men who say, Why buy a cow when you can get milk for free. Here's an update for you: Nowadays, 80% of women are against marriage, WHY? Because women realize it's not worth buying an entire pig just to get a little sausage.

Men are like....

1. Men are like ... Laxatives ... They irritate the crap out of you.
2. Men are like ... Bananas ... The older they get, the less firm they are.
3. Men are like ... Weather ... Nothing can be done to change them.
4. Men are like ... Blenders ... You need One, but you're not quite sure why.
5. Men are like ... Chocolate Bars ... Sweet, smooth, & they usually head right for your hips.
6. Men are like ... Commercials ... You can't believe a word they say.
7. Men are like ... Department Stores ... Their clothes are always 1/2 off.
8. Men are like ... Government Bonds ... They take soooooooo long to mature.
9. Men are like ... Mascara ... They usually run at the first sign of emotion.
10. Men are like ... Popcorn ... They satisfy you, but only for a little while.
11. Men are like ... Snowstorms ... You never know when they're coming, how many inches you'll get or how long it will last.
12. Men are like ... Lava Lamps ... Fun to look at, but not very bright.
13. Men are like ... Parking Spots ... All the good ones are taken, the rest are handicapped.

Now send this to all the remarkable women you know, as well as to any understanding good-natured, fun kinda guys you might be lucky enough to know !!!!!!!!!!

You Got Served!

For all you gambling fanatics out there looking for a new destination beyond Las Vegas, Macao considered by some to be the Monte Carlo of the Orient, is seen to be the next IT place for gamblers.

Macao poised to outshine Las Vegas
Financial Times, By Tom Mitchell in Hong Kong
Published: August 30 2006 19:02 | Last updated: August 30 2006 19:02

Macao is poised to eclipse the Las Vegas strip as the world’s biggest gambling market as early as the second half of this year, driven by a flurry of new casino openings in China’s former Portuguese enclave.

Gross gaming revenues in Macao reached $3.1bn in the first half of 2006, according to the territory’s Gaming Inspection and Coordination Bureau.

However, Clark County, which includes the greater Las Vegas area, will maintain its lead over Macao for the foreseeable future.

“It’s very likely that Macao will overtake the strip as the world’s biggest casino market,” said Gabriel Chan, a Hong Kong-based analyst with Credit Suisse, citing three forthcoming casino openings.

Macao has threatened to surpass Las Vegas before. It was neck-and-neck with the strip at the end of 2004, but Las Vegas saw off the challenge, helped in part by a dearth of new openings in Macao the following year.

Over the next 12 months, however, as many as six new developments with more than 2,000 tables are due to open in Macao. The last time there were major new openings, in 2004, gaming revenues surged by almost 45 per cent year-on-year.

Macao is closing the gap on Las Vegas despite hosting far fewer visitors than its US rival, highlighting the fact that Chinese gamblers make bigger bets.

I have hinted at the fact that I am working on a couple personal and professional goals and really have no time to date. However, I do often find myself daydreaming about having a boyfriend. But then I read stories like the one below and think it is just better to focus on my goals and not get distracted by all the drama necessary to find that one Prince amongst many frogs.

A Date That Will Live in Infamy: He was cheap, but he paid in the end. Big time
Washington Post, By Gene Weingarten, Sunday, July 30, 2006; Page W32

The e-mail that arrived the other day told the story of a guy who did something really cheesy to a woman he'd met through an online dating service. Here are the first names of all the people to whom this document had been forwarded before it reached me. I am leaving no names out:

Amanda, Lauren, Tabitha, Megan, Nicole, Rachell, Valerie, Sharon, Natasha, Natalie, Lori, Danielle, Bethany, Brooke, Denise, Elizabeth, Kristen, Gina, Leah, Margee, Michelle, Ashley, Sara, Rochelle, Lianne, Marisa, Renee, Abbie.

In short, this is the story of a guy who will never, ever, ever get a date again.

You may have heard about this; it's been on the Web. But this is probably the only authoritative account of it you will read, because, to my knowledge, I am the only person to have actually found the guy and spoken to him. I got to him early, before he disconnected his number, destroyed his phone, sold his house, changed his name, burned off his fingerprints, went into the witness protection program, etc. He sure ain't talking now.

His name is Darren. Hers is Joanne. Darren is the CEO of a small company. Joanne is a secretary. The two met on at a restaurant in New York City on June 4. Joanne had offered to pay half the check, but Darren gallantly declined. Later, however, when he could not reach Joanne and concluded she was not going to go out with him again, Darren decided she owed him for her half of the meal. He left a message on her answering machine. The audio was uploaded into the e-mail.

". . . You ate the food, you drank the wine. Do the right thing. The next time you go dating, be careful, don't lead guys on, which is what you did to me. Fifty dollars -- please put it in the mail, and we're done and you never have to hear from me again. Otherwise I am just gonna keep on top of this, and I don't think you want me to keep on top of this."

Darren apparently felt the price of the meal entitled him to a second date and whatever attendant benefits that might imply. Pretty petty and cheap, no? You are thinking "George Costanza," yes? Well, that is because you didn't actually hear his voice on that tape, as I did. If you had heard his voice, you would be thinking "Gilbert Gottfried."