April 2006 Archives

Despite the fact that the divorce rate is high, I still aspire to get married and have children someday. Thus it is sad when you hear that some African American children think that "marriage is for white people." Granted this perception has to do with the increasing number of single (mostly female) family households in the black community, but that doesn't mean that we shouldn't still aspire to having a two parent household. Particularly since studies show over and over again, that children are happier and more successful when they are in a loving two parent household.

Marriage is For White People
Washington Post, By Joy Jones
Sunday, March 26, 2006; Page B01

Among African Americans, the desire for marriage seems to have a different trajectory for women and men. My observation is that black women in their twenties and early thirties want to marry and commit at a time when black men their age are more likely to enjoy playing the field. As the woman realizes that a good marriage may not be as possible or sustainable as she would like, her focus turns to having a baby, or possibly improving her job status, perhaps by returning to school or investing more energy in her career.

As men mature, and begin to recognize the benefits of having a roost and roots (and to feel the consequences of their risky bachelor behavior), they are more willing to marry and settle down. By this time, however, many of their female peers are satisfied with the lives they have constructed and are less likely to settle for marriage to a man who doesn't bring much to the table. Indeed, he may bring too much to the table: children and their mothers from previous relationships, limited earning power, and the fallout from years of drug use, poor health care, sexual promiscuity. In other words, for the circumspect black woman, marriage may not be a business deal that offers sufficient return on investment.

In the past, marriage was primarily just such a business deal. Among wealthy families, it solidified political alliances or expanded land holdings. For poorer people, it was a means of managing the farm or operating a household. Today, people have become economically self-sufficient as individuals, no longer requiring a spouse for survival. African American women have always had a high rate of labor-force participation. "Why should well-salaried women marry?" asked black feminist and author Alice Dunbar-Nelson as early as 1895. But now instead of access only to low-paying jobs, we can earn a breadwinner's wage, which has changed what we want in a husband. "Women's expectations have changed dramatically while men's have not changed much at all," said one well-paid working wife and mother. "Women now say, 'Providing is not enough. I need more partnership.' "

Note: Link to Marriage is For White People article uncovered while at NegroPhile blog.

Chavs here in the UK (ie. Jordan) are the equivalent to American trailer trash (ie. Kevin Federline.) However, unlike "trailer trash", the term chav refers more to a persons lifestyle rather than their race. In fact, you can have chavs across racial lines.

Now I'm not a fan of using these sorts of racial/ethnic stereotypes as they can be quite hurtful, but it does quickly paint a picture as to the sort of people I'm referring to. In any event, according to this quiz, I am only 10% chav. Thank goodness. Had the percentage been higher I would have had to make some serious adjustment to my current lifestyle.

Wannabe chav
You are 10 % chav
You clearly know you are not, nor will you ever be anything even closely resembling a bonafide chav but that doesn't stop you from jumping on the bling bandwagon every now and then. There's nothing wrong with a bit of pretending though you'll never be able to hold your own with the true Burberry brigade.

Interestingly, the Burberry brand once associated with well dressed English men and women -- is now associated with chavs. As a result, the brand has suffered financially here in the UK.

For anyone out there considering moving oversees, the Transition Abroad Internet site is another good resource. I particularly like the page that list out all the expat Internet sites.

The number one reason for carrying my iPod is not to listen to my favorite music -- but to have it ready to turn on so I can block out the mostly obnoxious music from people who insist on blasting their music in what is often a very crowded commuter train.

It would be good if Kaavya Viswanathan, author of How Opal Mehta Got Kissed, Got Wild, and Got a Life just admitted that she flat out plagiarized text from Sloppy Firsts and Second Helpings, written by Megan McCafferty. To claim that the similarities are “unconscious and accidental” smacks of dishonesty.

Aggrieved Publisher Rejects Young Novelist's Apology New York Times, By DINITIA SMITH, Published: April 26, 2006

A day after Kaavya Viswanathan admitted copying parts of her chick-lit novel, "How Opal Mehta Got Kissed, Got Wild and Got a Life," from another writer's works, the publisher of the two books she borrowed from called her apology "troubling and disingenuous."

On Monday, Ms. Viswanathan, in an e-mail message, said that her copying from Megan McCafferty's "Sloppy Firsts" and "Second Helpings," both young adult novels published by Crown, a division of Random House, had been "unintentional and unconscious."

But in a statement issued today, Steve Ross, Crown's publisher, said that, "based on the scope and character of the similarities, it is inconceivable that this was a display of youthful innocence or an unconscious or unintentional act."

He said that there were more than 40 passages in Ms. Viswanathan's book "that contain identical language and/or common scene or dialogue structure from Megan McCafferty's first two books."

Mr. Ross called it "nothing less than an act of literary identity theft."

On Monday, Ms. Viswanathan and her publisher, Little, Brown, had said that future printings of the novel would be revised to "eliminate any inappropriate similarities" and that an acknowledgment to Ms. McCafferty would be added.

But Mr. Ross, in an interview, questioned how quickly that could be accomplished. The planned revisions, he said, would take several months, and "during those intervening months this original edition would still be in bookstores. That's one of the issues that is of great concern to us." Ms. McCafferty has a new book, "Charmed Thirds," in stores now, and Mr. Ross called the incident "an enormous distraction and disruption."

Mr. Ross added that Crown had not ruled out legal action. "Right now this is in the hands of our lawyers," he said. "We're waiting to see what their recommendations are."

Ms. McCafferty's agent, Joanna Pulcini, also reacted to Ms. Viswanathan's apology. "It is understandably difficult for us to accept that Ms. Viswanathan's plagiarism was 'unintentional and unconscious,' as she has claimed," she said in a statement.

Michael Pietsch, publisher of Little, Brown, said in response to Mr. Ross's statement, that the company was looking forward to "a speedy and amicable" solution. He added, however, he had not yet seen the 40 similarities that Mr. Ross has said existed between the books. "We look forward to hearing from the author and from Random House and to resolving this."

The Harvard Crimson first reported the plagiarism charges on Saturday.

Meanwhile Harvard would not say what, if any, disciplinary action it might take against Ms. Viswanathan. Robert Mitchell, the director of communications for Harvard's Faculty of Arts and Sciences, said in an interview, "We would not discuss any individual situation that might or might not come before the administrative board."

I don't bedgrudge my 20/30 something friends who have parents to help them out financially, but at some point, we all need to become truly independent -- and if that means living below the middle class lifestyle we aspire to until we can really afford it, then so be it.

The Bank of Mom & Dad
By ANNA BAHNEY
Published: New York Times, April 20, 2006

AT 23, Jason McGuinness lives a postcollege life in Manhattan that is very nearly typical. He works as a media research analyst, making about $30,000 a year. Sharing a two-bedroom apartment on the fourth floor of a walk-up building with a roommate on the Upper East Side, his portion of the rent is $1,100 monthly.

The walls are decorated with pennants and posters from Syracuse University, his alma mater. He orders takeout dinners, carries peanut-butter sandwiches to work and occasionally takes in a Mets game with friends.

And like many of his peers — educated, employed, urban-dwelling young adults — he receives monthly assistance from his parents, in the form of a $300 check and the payment of his cellphone bill.

This is not the largesse of wealthy families doled out through trust funds. Nor is the money a couple of $20 bills tucked into a card at the holidays. Mr. McGuinness and others like him are the beneficiaries of an increasingly common subsidy arriving regularly from Mom and Dad, something like a family fellowship.

It helps to pay for housing, bills and travel expenses, and the support has been increasing for the past two decades as education is extended, marriage is delayed and young people take the scenic route from adolescence to adulthood.

"Everybody I know is supporting their children in some way," said Gail Horowitz, Mr. McGuinness's mother, a vice president of the Zlokower Company, a public relations firm in Manhattan. Unlike young adults who "boomerang" back home to live with their parents — the subject of the recent comedy "Failure to Launch" — these young people live independently. But they need help to make ends meet, or put another way, to maintain a middle-class way of life.

The bottom line is that the assumption that financial obligations to children ended after graduation from high school or college is going the way of the pay phone. Today, parents are finding that they are on the hook for more, sometimes much more — contributions of thousands of dollars a year to help young men and women get on their feet economically, often into their 30's.

I'm sure I sound like a broken record to family and friends when I talk about how expensive London is, but as this article demonstrates, it is possible for a family of five, to have a fun filled four-day vacation here on a budget of £1,000 ($1784).

For my fellow Americans who might be bemoaning the fact that they are paying $3 a gallon for gasoline, consider the fact that most European drivers have it a lot worse. Here in the UK, drivers pay 90 pence for a litre of gas. Americans pay 36 pence for that same litre.

Note: 1 litre = 0.26 gallons. Today, 1 U.S. dollar = 0.561892454 British pound.

The World Citizen Guide published by the Business for Diplomatic Action offers good advice for Americans traveling abroad. Among the tips offered:

'Speak softly, don't argue and slow down' By Philip Sherwell, Telegraph, Filed: 16/04/2006

• Think as big as you like but talk and act smaller. (In many countries, any form of boasting is considered very rude. Talking about wealth, power or status - corporate or personal - can create resentment.)

• Listen at least as much as you talk. (By all means, talk about America and your life in our country. But also ask people you're visiting about themselves and their way of life.)

• Save the lectures for your kids. (Whatever your subject of discussion, let it be a discussion not a lecture. Justified or not, the US is seen as imposing its will on the world.)

• Think a little locally. (Try to find a few topics that are important in the local popular culture. Remember, most people in the world have little or no interest in the World Series or the Super Bowl. What we call "soccer" is football everywhere else. And it's the most popular sport on the planet.)

• Slow down. (We talk fast, eat fast, move fast, live fast. Many cultures do not.)

• Speak lower and slower. (A loud voice is often perceived as bragging. A fast talker can be seen as aggressive and threatening.)

• Your religion is your religion and not necessarily theirs. (Religion is usually considered deeply personal, not a subject for public discussions.)

• If you talk politics, talk - don't argue. (Steer clear of arguments about American politics, even if someone is attacking US politicians or policies. Agree to disagree.)

Ok - I know some of the advice might seem patronizing, but a little effort goes a long way over here -- particularly since Americans unfortunately don’t have the best reputation when it comes to their behavior while traveling internationally.

1. Spring is trying to break in London, but it's not hot enough for me. So I'm thinking about taking another mini-break. Goodness, where should I go?

2. I'm trying to build up the courage to take this flirting and walking tour of London class.

3. I spent most of this morning watching the London Marathon on TV. I felt so inspired, that I'm considering training for a marathon. So we'll see whether or not I follow through once I get better from this awful illness.

The Chicago Public Schools spends hundreds of millions of dollars trying to educate children in the city, yet the schools continue to fail. How sad.

OF 100 CHICAGO PUBLIC SCHOOL FRESHMEN, SIX WILL GET A COLLEGE DEGREE

By Jodi S. Cohen and Darnell Little, Tribune staff reporters. Tribune staff reporter Tracy Dell'Angela contributed to this report
Published April 21, 2006

Of every 100 freshmen entering a Chicago public high school, only about six will earn a bachelor's degree by the time they're in their mid-20s, according to a first-of-its-kind study released Thursday by the Consortium on Chicago School Research.

The prospects are even worse for African-American and Latino male freshmen, who only have about a 3 percent chance of obtaining a bachelor's degree by the time they're 25.

The study, which tracked Chicago high school students who graduated in 1998 and 1999, also found that making it to college doesn't ensure success: Of the city public school students who went to a four-year college, only about 35 percent earned a bachelor's degree within six years, compared with 64 percent nationally.

Researchers say they're not exactly sure why Chicago schools alumni graduate from college in such low numbers, but that poor preparation during high school and too few resources at the college level contribute to the problem.

Now a university degree isn't the ultimate measure of success, but when only 6 of 100 are completing such a degree, then something is really really wrong with the system.

I am by no means an expert on moving abroad, but thought I'd share some tips for those of you out there who might be thinking about taking the plunge.

1. Research: Start by making a list of reason to stay and reasons to move abroad. Also, check out your local bookstore for books that talk about being an expat in your chosen destination. For me, a good starting point was: Living and Working in Britain (Fifth Edition) by David Hampshire. Another good reference book for anyone considering London is: Living in London published by the Junior League of London. What’s great about this book is that it’s written by Americans who have lived in London.

2. Network: Tell people that you are thinking about moving abroad. You never know who might be able to help facilitate the move. Particularly seek out people who have lived abroad. If you don't know anyone personally, do research via the Internet to find expats in your destination of choice. Some of the best advice I got was gleamed by reading the archives and talking to people online via the Americans in UK Forum.

3. Organize: If after researching and networking, you still want to go for it or better yet, you've landed a job, start planning and get your documents organized. This includes:

A. Immigration documents. It goes without saying that your passport and appropriate visas need to be up to date. If you can't get the appropriate work visa, I'd say postpone the move until you can make it happen. Getting a professional job in a foreign country is extremely difficult and not having appropriate paperwork will make it next to impossible. If all else fails, consider getting a graduate degree abroad. You'll still get the living abroad experience; you just won't be able to work. Plus, if you get an graduate degree like an MBA, thinking that will make you more attractive to employers back home or another international destination.

B: Employment documents. If you are lucky enough to land a job before you move over, get the company to write a letter stating when your employment starts and your annual salary in the local currency. This will be most helpful as you try and rent an apartment and or get the ever elusive bank account set up.

C. Banking records. Getting a new account in your new country -- even if you have stellar credit in your home country can prove to be difficult, so its best to get a letter of recommendation from your current bank, as well as have bank statements for the last 3 to 6 months. And whatever you do, DO NOT close your current bank account. If you are like me, you'll need to pay your student loans in US funds, so this comes in handy.

D. Medical records. Get your annual medical and dental check up. Plus also get a copy of your records from both doctors. This is useful if you have a complicated medical history. Also, if you have long standing medication, I'd recommend getting a supply for at least 3 to 6 months. In the UK you need to register with a doctor in your neighborhood -- and that all takes times.

E. Property Records. Gather information to show that you are a good tenant. If you own your own property, it would be good to get a letter from the mortgage company showing that you were a customer in good standing. If you are a renter like myself, get a letter from your landlord indicating how long you have lived at property, that you kept property up and more importantly that you always paid on time. Ideally, you should have letters covering the last 5 years.

4. Storage/Shipping: Have a good clean out. If you are a hoarder like myself, that won't be easy. But its necessary -- even if your company is going to pay for your items to be shipped abroad. I say this because if you are moving to a city like London which has lovely but ever so tiny flats, finding a place to fit all your "American size" furniture won't be easy. So its best to leave it at home. Particularly if you know for a fact that the move abroad will be temporary.

If you are stubborn like me and want to be surrounded by your things, get ruthless and pair things down. More importantly, seek out a reputable mover. This proved to be the most daunting challenge as everywhere I went on the Internet; I kept reading horror stories about international movers. As such, would recommend researching shipping companies via the Better Business Bureau and also sites like MovingScam.com. Then narrow down the list to only those who will come to your house to look over items before finalizing quote. Also, pick a local company that can handle packing and getting the items ready for international shipment. Finally, do get replacement insurance. Purchasing or repairing items abroad can be really expensive.

In the end, I went with Pickens-Kane Allied International (303 Munroe Drive, Bloomingdale, IL 60108, 630-924-4400). They were not the cheapest, but the staff was the most professional and made me feel like my stuff wasn't going to get lost somewhere in the Bermuda triangle. In fact, as agreed, my items arrived safetly in London a month after I did. Long before the box with my receipts and other assorted documents arrived that was shipped via the USPS. In fact, that took almost two months.

5. Pets: If you can, bring them. It's not cheap and the process can be somewhat complicated, but its totally worth it in then end. Truth be told, Choo-Choo has provided a great deal of comfort this last year and so I'm really glad he made the journey with me.

6. Saying Good-bye/Staying Connected: Once you decide to leave, visit all your favorite places in your current city of residence. More importantly, spend time with the people that are important to you. It's easy to get caught up in the move, but if you move as far as I did, it’s important to let people know that just because you are moving on, you don't want to be forgotten. Plus you really value your relationship with them. If you don't already have a blog, this would also be a perfect time to set one up. Particularly since it will provide a good way for you to stay connected with family and friends back home.

So how long will all of this take? Well if you are single, you can definitely do it in 3 to 6 months. If you've got a family, it will definitely take more time -- maybe even up to a year. But don't be discouraged because if planned properly, it will all be worth it in the end.

One year ago today, I moved from Chicago to London. Things happened rather quickly once I decided to proceed with the move, but anyone close to me will attest to that fact that this was not an easy decision or one made overnight. In fact, I had been thinking about such a move for years. However, I never went through it earlier as I knew that moving abroad is not for the faint of heart. There is a lot of upheaval and no real guarantee that the move will live up to ones expectations -- particularly if you are doing it alone.

So to say that this past year has been quite the journey, is an understatement. There have been a few times (mostly when I'm sick or alone) when serious doubt has crept up. In the previous 10 years, I had built up a very comfortable life in Chicago with lots of wonderful friends. However, there have been a lot of other moments, when I look back and affirm that at that time in my life, this was the best decision for me. I was accomplished in Chicago, but I wasn't happy. I was going through the motions with life and wasn't really living up to my potential. Plus once I realized that my relationship with Racquetball Guy wasn't going to work out, I knew I had to make a change. It would have been easier to try and make a change in Chicago, but I didn't want that. I wanted to do something big and bold. I was tired of playing it safe. Plus for a number of other reasons, the timing was right – one big one was the fact that I work for a company that was willing to help facilitate the move.

So now that I'm here, has it been easy? No! But I think a lot of that has to do with the fact that I'm still in the adjustment phase. And really, had I moved somewhere else in the States, I think I would have had similar challenges. It's tough moving to a new city where you don’t really know anyone. And as you get older, its tough finding people that you deem worthy to be in your social network. I'm making progress, but it's very much a work in progress.

So do I regret the move? No! This really was the best thing for me. Yes, I'm still going through some growing pains, and I feel homesick at times, but I know that over time, London will live up to my expectations. In fact, it already has. It's very multi-cultural and I've met lots of wonderful people. Plus it offers insight and access to the rest of the world that I never would have gotten by living in another American city. In addition, I'm getting the opportunity to explore Europe. So far I've been to Amsterdam, Prague and my all time favorite so far in Europe, Barcelona!

So would I recommend a move abroad? Yes, but only after careful consideration. Ideally, it’s great if you can find a company to sponsor you, but it's not impossible to go it alone. Particularly if you've got the appropriate funds (ideally about 3 to 6 months living expenses) and already have the immigration/work visa angle worked out.

I'm not really a fan of the House of Windsor and all their entitlements at the British tax payers expense, but in that "royal" tourism does bring in the dollars and so as not to appear like a bad guest, I thought I'd give a shout out to the Queen, on this her 80th birthday.

Most European MBA programs are about 12 to 15 months. And it looks like British undergraduate students will now be able to get an Honors (Bachelors) Degree in 2 years. They'll still have to do the same course work as the 3 year programs; they'll just have greater flexibility in when they can take their course work to get it done. Personally, I think that's a good think. Particularly when you factor in the increasing cost of financing a university education. Maybe now schools will stop being so academic and actually educate and better train young people for jobs in the real world.

In some American neighborhoods, you are likely to find not only a church but a liquor store on almost every main corner. Well here in Britian, you are more likely to find a betting shop on every high street, sometimes two or three. The net result is that more and more people are gambling. In fact:

Britons gambled £50 billion last year - more than the state spent on defence and transport combined. That represents more than £800 for every man, woman and child and is a seven-fold increase on the total gambled in 2001.

Wow! I guess this is good for the economy, but I have my doubts about how positive this is for our society in general.

Thanks to continued excellent customer service provided by the fine folks over at LivingDot, I am now running this blog with the latest version of movable type. Thinking this will go along way in solving the trackback spam problem I was experiencing. As such, you no longer need to use typekey to leave a comment.

Yesterday I wrote what can best be described as a pity me post which I almost immediately unpublished. I wrote the post as I was feeling really emotional. Mainly because I haven't had a proper nights sleep since last Monday and my diet has been reduced to 90% liquid since the excessive coughing ultimately ends up with me pewking my guts out. So I was feeling really irritable and a bit sorry for myself.

I was also feeling lonely and perhaps a bit worried that I might end up like 40 year old Joyce Vincent, a London woman who was found dead in her apartment this past January. Apparently, she had been dead for two plus years and no one bothered to sound the alarms about her disappearance. Not her family or friends. Not her neighbors. Not anyone. The only reason her body was discovered is because the landlord, the local council came to reposes the apartment due to lack of payment.

So Joyce's situation while a bit extreme, made me think of my own. I'm a single woman in a foreign country with little family or friends around. That got me thinking about what would happen if I fell dangerously ill or God forbid dead in my apartment. More importantly, who would sound the alarm and how quickly? Hopefully, someone out there would a lot sooner than occurred in this case because if not, it would mean that I really haven’t had the kind of impact I thought I had on some of the people (i.e. family members, friends and maybe even a few coworkers, etc.) that have crossed my life these past 35 years.

Hopefully, an alarm will never be needed. And more immediately, that I get over this damn illness. It's really bringing my energy and mood down.

It's tough to be brave all the time. Especially when most people think you've got your shit together and really, all you feel is loneliness inside – no matter how many people you surround yourself with. You wonder why, despite all that you have accomplished, you always feel so unfulfilled. Why, everyone you have ever loved always leaves you. Why you have to be so damn hard on yourself. If anyone will ever truly love you for all that you currently are and could be. Or whether you will always be lonely and never anyone’s wife or mother. You wonder why God chose this oh so difficult path for you. Or more immediately, when this wretched cough will go away. I am feeling so sleep deprived.

British television is filled up with lots of game and quiz shows. Most of them are awful and seem only there to have the contestants humiliate themselves all in a bid to win money – usually a paltry sum. Now there is a new one currently in production that has upped the ante by embracing how dumb these shows (and unfortunately many of their contestants) really are.

The show, of which I speak, is the Con Test. According to the producers: "The Con Test is a quiz with a difference." That difference as pointed out by recent Sunday Times article is that "the contestants do not have to know any of the answers or even understand the questions. They will simply have to persuade others that they do."

The big draw of course for the contestants is the money -- £1million pounds to be exact. So what's wrong with that? Well nothing really if you like watching people make fool of themselves. Personally, I'd prefer to watch a quiz show more in the style of Jeopardy. A show that rewards people for being smart and intelligent.

Ok, I know this might make me seem slightly pretentious, but really, why does our culture seem to be heading in a direction where we encourage people to want to become famous or get rich for being stupid and doing and saying dumb things?

What happened to hard work and people making money the old fashion way? What happened to people aspiring to be educated and becoming intellectuals? I know this might not make for good television, but I'm really sick of the dumb celebrity, model, reality show and quiz show contestants, etc. As such, put these people back in the closet where they belong. This bad joke, the dumbing down of our society in the name of fame and fortune has gone on way too long.

What's worst than coughing so hard that you feel like your ribs are going to crack? Well, coughing so hard that you feel it in your uterus.

Truth be told, I almost feel like I’m trying to push something out. Thankfully there is nothing down there, but it still hurts like hell. As such, bronchitis, acute or not is a bitch!

The Easter break turns out to be a long four day weekend. Not only do I get Good Friday off, but next Monday is a bank holiday. However, unlike most people, I will not be out having fun. I’m housebound -- stuck in bed. Main reason is that I've picked up a viral respiratory infection (most likely from work -- again!), that comes with a nasty chest cough. Really acute bronchitis that's one step away from full fledged pneumonia.

Initially, I didn't think it was that serious. However, after coughing to the point of pewking non stop for two days, I went to the doctor who made the diagnosis. He has me on two different medications plus an inhaler like the ones used by asthmatics. I suppose it could be worst, but when you can feel every cough down by your ribs, that’s bad enough. So hopefully the symptoms won't last beyond the typical 7 to 10 days. Either way, I have to go back on Tuesday so that the doctor can give me the all clear.

Moving abroad isn't for everyone. But there are lots of people who do it and find happiness. And as the article below points out, the reasons can be quite varied.

Transatlantic drift
By Richard Tomkins
Published: Financial Times, April 8 2006

A lot of people ask Pattie Jenkins why anyone like her, American born and bred, would want to become a British citizen. Here, just quickly, is the story of how she left her home in Atlanta, Georgia, and ended up living in south Wales.

In 1994 Jenkins picked up a novel called Outlander, a historical romance about an American nurse in 20th-century Scotland who found herself thrown back in time to 1743, shortly before the Battle of Culloden. The book had such a powerful impact on Jenkins that she became obsessed with Scotland and decided she had to go there. Soon after, she joined an international pen friend club in the hope of making contact with Scottish people.

Unfortunately, of all the pen friend replies Jenkins received, not one was from a Scot. But she did get a letter from someone called Gary in Wales. After writing to each other for 19 months and exchanging visits, they eventually married and Jenkins felt they should live in Britain to be part of Gary's close-knit family. Now they live in Pontypool, where Jenkins has found her vocation as a mental health support worker and their five-year-old son is growing up bilingual in Welsh and English.

Oh, and they did at least spend their honeymoon in Scotland, so Jenkins' ambition was fulfilled.

You might say it was an odd turn of events that brought Jenkins to Britain. Perhaps more surprising, though, is that she is far from alone. It is well known that Americans visit Britain in large numbers - each year they greatly outnumber visitors from any other country outside Europe. What is less well known is that thousands arrive and never leave - so many, in fact, that they constitute one of the biggest groups of immigrants to the UK.

In 2004, the latest year for which figures are available, the 4,120 Americans given indefinite leave to remain in the UK easily outnumbered the 3,115 Bangladeshis granted permanent residence, even though Bangladesh has long been seen as one of the biggest sources of immigration to Britain. Americans also outnumbered the 3,825 Somalis, the 3,240 Australians, the 2,930 Jamaicans, the 2,315 Chinese, the 1,725 Iranians and the 1,720 Iraqis.

Only in London would a retailer think there be a market for a £85 ($148 US) sandwich. Now I love Selfridges Department Store, but this makes them seem even more out of touch and exclusive than they really are or should desire to be.

Most expensive sandwich in London goes on sale Monday, 10th April 2006, 17:54

LIFE STYLE EXTRA (UK) - London's most expensive sandwich went on sale at Selfridges today and at £85 and 2,000 Calories it promised to lighten pockets and expand waistlines.

The McDonald Sandwich is the brainchild of Selfridges chef Scott McDonald, who said the idea came to him while taking the train home three weeks ago.

He said: "I wanted to say 'If money was no object, what would you put in a sandwich?'.

"It wasn't just a case of using the most expensive produce, the flavours are exceptional, they marry really well.

"You get absolutely amazing taste from every level as opposed to a taste explosion."

The main expense of the sandwich is the Wagyu beef, which is flown in fresh from Japan, and comes from cows that were massaged and fed on beer.

Other ingredients include fresh lobe frois gras and black truffle mayonnaise.

Mr McDonald added: "Tasting it you would probably think 'Bloody hell, that's rich'."

The first person to buy the sandwich was food buff Jan Gedzisz, who was taking it back to the office to share with his boss.

The 61-year-old widower said: "I'm feeling very peckish so it should go down well.

"My friends will say that I am absolutely mad spending £85 on a sandwich, but if it's very satisfying then that's OK. I'm a big food fan."

Selfridges had received seven pre-orders for the 21-ounce (595g) meal, which takes about ten minutes to prepare.

Catherine Ashton-Stones, 23, a trainee journalist from Cumbria, got to sample the sandwich and said: "It was really like a meal in itself.

"I do feel quite full even though I only had a really small section.

"The bread was really nice but would I pay £85 for it? I don't think so."

Not every shopper in the posh Oxford Street store was prepared to pay that much for a sandwich.

Retired Brian Tiernan, from London, said: "You must be joking. You can get a suit for that much.

"Even if I had a pension as big as Tony Blair's I wouldn't spend it on an £85 sandwich."

Joyce Holt, from Essex, also retired, said she wouldn't buy one "in two million years".

She added: "It's a bit ridiculous, isn't it?

"Two slices of bread and some filling. I'd be very surprised if they sell one a day."

Heather Bonnie, a 23-year-old university lecturer from Workington, said: "I'd only spend £6 in London for a sandwich."

Rosemarie Gillard, a doctor's practice manager from London, said: "I wouldn't pay that for a steak, let alone a sandwich."

In news of the mundane, I am happy to report that I finally have a proper bed to sleep on. You may recall that the base for the queen size bed I shipped over from the States wouldn't fit up the very narrow English stairway. So I've been sleeping on the mattress, which really is quite comfortable. I initially thought about getting another bed straight away, but I couldn't bring myself to fork over £1000+ on a new one. Now I know I could opted for cheaper bed, but in that I spend so much time in bed, I really wanted one that would be comfortable, firm as well as durable. That meant shelling out quite a bit. So I delayed the purchase.

Then, during the after Christmas/January sales, I finally broke down and purchased a new one which finally got delivered this weekend. It was still expensive as heck, but at 50% off, I knew I wouldn't get a better deal until perhaps the next January sale. It's still the same size (American Queen/UK King) as the one I shipped over, but the big difference is that the base comes in two pieces which makes it easier to get up the stairs. In case you are wondering why I just didn't buy the base, well I checked, but none of the bedding stores would allow me to do that.

In any event, below is a picture of Choo-Choo lounging on the new bed as I try and read The Sunday Times. Arrh, yes -- the good life.

Btw, the company that I purchased the bed from, Ely's of Wimbledon would not remove my not so old bed -- not even for a fee. This I have to contract with my local council who wants £15 for the service. Ideally, I'd like to keep it so that when I move to my next place, I'll have a bed for my guest to sleep on. But in that there is no guarantee that I'll be able to get it up the stairs in the new flat and more importantly, I have no where to store it, I'll have to get rid of it. I could try and sell it as it’s in relatively good condition, but really, who wants to buy a used bed from a stranger? Surely not me! So in the hallway it stays until I figure out what to do with it.

Bird Flu was discovered on British soil last week and the media along with some politicians are doing everything they can to feed the hysteria. Personally, I think it’s somewhat irresponsible. I'm not saying the government shouldn't plan behind the scene to curtail a potential epidemic, but throwing out numbers like 100,000 students potentially dead when no human in this country has yet to be infected with the H5N1 virus is just plain alarmist and not very helpful to general population. Particularly since the virus does not transfer easily from birds to human. In fact, you need close contact with the infected birds, which explains why despite the spread across continents, only 190 people in the world so far have been infected. SO thank God for that.

I am fighting a loosing battle against trackback spam. The more I delete and de-spam, the more they appear. This in turn is affecting your ability to leave comments. As such, those who wish to comment on my blog will need to register with TypeKey. The beauty of this service which is free, is that you can also used it on thousands of other blogs powered by Moveable Type. More importantly, it will ensure that your comments which I welcome get automatically registered. So thanks in advance for complying while I figure out a long term solution to trackback spam.

Long before I moved to London, I thought of moving to Paris. I fell in love with the romanticized version of the city. But I never seriously explored a move there, because while I had studied French at University, I never got close to being fluent. I know just enough to be dangerous on holiday, but not enough to get a job and be functional without continually feeling frustrated by the potential language barrier. So recognizing my limitation, I looked elsewhere -- London to be exact.

And let me say how glad I am that I never moved to France – even for a short while, as the county is a mess. This is evidenced by the youth riots last November. The issue there was that the youth, many of whom are the children of immigrants from Africa and the Middle East, don't particularly feel welcome in the country of their birth. They feel disfranchised and isolated in the ghetto suburbs which offer little hope for jobs or upward mobility.

Plus now, there are student strikes supported by all the unions. The mostly middle-class and White student population are striking (who knew students had rights to strike), because the government wants to pass a law giving corporations the right to fire youth employees under 26 years old after 24 months if they are not performing. Apparently this new law is simply too British really American. So they are rejecting it.

Now if the economy in France was prospering, I’d be somewhat sympathetic to the students -- but with unemployment rates at 22%, the highest in Western Europe, I’m baffled. Perhaps I’m too much of a capitalist. I just assume that they (the students) would welcome the opportunity for corporates to create more jobs for young people, even if that meant unlike years past, there would be no guarantees for lifetime employment.

My French colleague said they, the students are just lazy and suffer from entitlement syndrome. Thinking she might be right. Plus I think this might just be one of the growing pains of changing from a socialist to a capitalist society. Either way, France one of the leading nations in Europe, and the European Union, which at its core is about helping the nations here to be more competitive in a global market needs to figure out something fast. Because if they don’t, they along with Italy whose economy is also a mess, might spell disaster for the whole union and its single currency.

My daily commute takes me past the Royal Court of Justice in London. From the exterior, this Victorian gothic building is quite grand and magnificent and so one day soon, I really must take the time to explore.

I bring all of this up, as its where Random House, the publishers of the best selling Da Vinci Code by Dan Brown was tried for copyright infringement. Personally, I've though the court case which lasted 3 months to be quite frivolous, and so was glad to hear that the Judge dismissed the case. Furthermore, I agree with Justice Peter Smith when he speculated that the case brought by Michael Baigent and Richard Leigh, co-authors of The Holy Blood and The Holy Grail, might all have been a ploy to simply sell more books. As such, hopefully the combined legal bill approaching nearly £2 million which they are now responsible for paying, will deter these sorts of suits in the future.

Average house prices in London recently hit £300,000 (about $525,300). Dear lord, I better find a husband fast so I can increase my buying power, rethink the neighorhoods on the target list when it comes time to buy, or consider moving out of London. These prices are totally outrageous and almost out of reach of the average worker.

In 10 years of living at the same apartment in Chicago, not once did the property management company ring up and say that they were coming over for an inspection of the premises.

However, since I moved into my current flat in Wimbledon, I've received not 1 but 2 calls re inspections. Now I understand that with property values being what they are, the landlord wants to make sure that I'm taking care of the property, but I find the inspections which are apparently routine over here, to be annoying and an invasion of my privacy -- particularly since the 2nd one, as with the 1st that happened about 6 months ago is being done while I'm at work.

It should be noted that my flat is being managed by the same company, Foxtons, that was recently prominently featured in the BBC expose of shady estate agents. Luckily, I just rented and didn't purchase an apartment from them. Also in fairness, I actually like the estate agent I dealt with. In fact I'm still in touch with her.

Last night while folding my laundry, I watched the rebroadcast of a show titled: Britain’s Sexual Fantasies. It was presented by Brett Kahr a psychotherapist who had anonymously surveyed 5000 British people on their sexual fantasies.

What I found most disturbing about his presentation was his theory that our sexual fantasies often relate back to some awful children trauma -- typically emotional, physical or worse yet sexual abuse. Apparently we "co-opt these traumas and sexualize them to give us a sense of power over them."

Since then I've been trying to analyze my own fantasies to see if they connect back in some way to some trauma from my past. Can't come up with anything yet. But I find it upsetting to think that something that caused me pain (emotional or physical) would become the inspiration for that which would give me sexual pleasure -- provided of course I acted on it.

Personally, I think sexual fantasies, should be left as fantasies because if acted out, they often don't live up to the fantasy. Well that's what I'm thinking anyway. I've never acted out one before.

The Times, October 5th 2005 Fearful fantasies

You might think that the safest sort of sex you can have is the sort that stays in your head. But the marital psychotherapist Brett Kahr who has polled thousands of Britons, says that our sexual fantasies are formed from the worst experiences we’ve ever had.

Results from his 55-item questionnaire indicate that many Britons’ relationships would implode if their partners revealed their fantasies to each other. About one woman in three, for example, fantasises about lesbian sex, while more than half of the men questioned by the YouGov pollsters imagine work colleagues while making love with their partners.

“You can be naked in bed with someone, but couples have almost no communication about the true content of their sexual fantasies,” says Kahr, who has made Britain’s Sexual Fantasies for Channel 5.

The key to people’s deepest fantasies is in our masturbatory thoughts, not the ones we have during sex, he says.

Most disturbingly, he says his work reveals that our sexual fantasies are linked to childhood trauma. He claims that we co-opt those traumas and sexualise them to give us a sense of power over them.

But are all fantasies pathological? “Critics might say that I have interviewed only people who may have problems with their fantasies, though that’s arguable,” says Kahr.

Phew, that’s me off the hook. And maybe you, too.

By the way, if you are interested in reading more about Kahr's theory, you can check out his book: "Who's Been Sleeping in Your Head?: The Sexual Fantasies of the British" when it is published later this year (September 2006, ISBN: 0713999403).

My sophomore year at Michigan, I lived next door to this gal who was a member of the varsity rowing team. She was the true definition of student-athlete. She rose early almost every morning to practice and train for a sport that would never get even 5% of the glory showered on the football or basketball team, even if they won a national championship. Yet she never complained. Plus she was even more dedicated to her studies. Most nights you would find her studying at the library.

I thought of her this past weekend, with the media build up to the 152nd annual Oxford and Cambridge University Boat Race. Since rowing doesn't have a huge fan base in the United States, I was surprised to learn that this event is watched by millions of people worldwide. Here is what the official website states:

The Boat Race is one of the most popular events in the British sporting calendar and attracts a massive crowd of around 250,000 to the banks of the River Thames between Putney and Mortlake. For the last five years, the BBC Television audience for the Boat Race has averaged over six million, making it a top five live televised annual British sporting event (along with the Grand National, the FA Cup Final, Wimbledon Men"s final and the British Grand Prix). In 2003 the TV audience for The Race was 7.7 million. The event also has a huge international following with an estimated global audience of 400 million in around 180 countries.

Surprised by these numbers, I decided to head down to Putney Bridge which is only a few stops away from Wimbledon on the train to check out the event for myself. It was indeed a festive atmosphere and I managed to find a perfect spot to view the start of the race. But instead of going to a local bar to watch the end of the race, I raced home since with the rains, many establishments were beyond capacity. However, as the race was over in 18 minutes, I missed it. I did get to see the presentation of the trophy to the Oxford team who won the race. So next year, if I'm around, I’ll have to come up with a better plan to see both the start and end of this 4mile boat race. Better yet, I might just stay home and watch. Things were a bit chaotic around the starting point.

Congratulations and best wishes to my best guy friend and financée who get married in Las Vegas today. I promise to be at your golden wedding celebration -- provided of course I'm invited.

Good Lord, say it ain't so. Google has gotten into the romance business.

When you think about it, love is just another search problem. And we’ve thought about it. A lot. Google Romance™ is our solution.

Google Romance is a place where you can post all types of romantic information and, using our Soulmate Search™, get back search results that could, in theory, include the love of your life. Then we'll send you both on a Contextual DateTM, which we'll pay for while delivering to you relevant ads that we and our advertising partners think will help produce the dating results you're looking for.

With Google Romance, you can:

Upload your profile – tell the world who you are, or, more to the point, who you’d like to think you are, or, even more to the point, who you want others to think you are.
Search for love in all (or at least a statistically significant majority of) the right places with Soulmate Search, our eerily effective psychographic matchmaking software.
Endure, via our Contextual Dating option, thematically appropriate multimedia advertising throughout the entirety of your free date.

Hmmm! I might just have to reconsider my ban on using an online dating service. Particularly since this one is free!

Update 12:24pm: Ok. Never mind. April Fools! Damn! That was really cruel. I'm kinda depressed about this not being real.

Amsterdam pictures are now up at Flickr. You can read the summary: here(day one), here(day two), here(day three), here(day four) and here(day five). Enjoy!

Pictures taken during my recent trip to Prague are now up on Flickr. Enjoy! Now if only I could get around to writing that all in important summary.

Several years ago, in an effort to alleviate traffic congestion in London, and encourage people to use public transportation, the city implemented a congestion charge (think toll), to drive into the city. The fee back then (February 2003), was £5. Now its £8 and some think it may go up even further.

As such, this is very upsetting to most that have to drive into the city for work. But they wouldn't dare not pay the fee because they would be subjected to a daily £50 fine. But workers at the American Embassy are refusing to pay the charge. Reason being is that they consider this to be a "local tax and therefore, under the Vienna Convention, does not apply to foreign diplomats."

This nonpayment has made the London Mayor Livingstone really upset and he has once again lashed out without thinking. His latest harsh words are for the fairly new American Ambassador, who he calls a "chiselling little crook". Goodness! So much good relations between the British and the Americans.

Either way, I do think the Mayor has a point. The workers at the American Embassy should pay the fee – particularly since as I understand, British officials do pay the road tolls when they drive on American highways. Furthermore, those who use the roads here in London to routinely drive should have to pay more than regular public transportation commuters like me to maintain them. But using the above language to describe the Ambassador doesn't help his or London's cause.

Times Online March 28, 2006
London mayor calls US envoy a 'chiselling little crook'
By Times Online and PA News

Ken Livingstone has been reported to a local government standards watchdog after likening the US ambassador in London to a "chiselling little crook".

The Mayor of London made the off-the-cuff comment while giving his opinion of the US Embassy’s decision not to make its diplomats pay the congestion charge when driving into the centre of the capital.

Mr Livingstone’s latest outburst came in a row over whether diplomats at the US Embassy should pay the £8-a-day congestion charge.

Since last summer, when the charge increased from £5 to £8, the Embassy has maintained that it is a local tax and therefore, under the Vienna Convention, does not apply to foreign diplomats. It now owes more than £150,000.

Mr Livingtone’s ire was directed at the relatively new US Ambassador Robert Tuttle. The Mayor said: "Since this new ambassador took over in July they have not paid. When British troops are putting their lives on the line for American foreign policy it would be quite nice if they paid the congestion charge.

"We will find a way of getting them into court either here or in America. We are not going to have them skive out of their responsibilities. This new ambassador is a car salesman and an ally of President Bush. This is clearly a political decision."