Wearing My Hair Natural


I am trying to wear my hair natural and feeling somewhat frustrated. It is thick and nappy and almost untamable. I am not trying to make a political statement, I am just sick of paying so much to get my hair done. I use to have a perm, but I got tired of that and wore braids to let the perm grow out. Now, just to get my hair washed, conditioned and hot pressed (blown straight) cost like $55 and that doesn’t even last more than a week sometimes, particularly if I am being good about going to the gym. Lately, it has been one of the main excuses for not going to the gym; I do not want to sweat my hair out. Crazy–but true! So I am trying to see if I can wear it natural. But having done it for three days, I am aggravated and I just do not know if I can make it work. On Monday I went to work wearing an afro puff (better known as bun). I simply wasn’t ready to let it all hang out. Then on Tuesday, I left wearing the afro but by the time I got to work, it was all over the place that I put it back in the ponytail. It was so windy and my hair did not lay flat that I looked like a crazy woman. Same for Wednesday. So I’m trying to figure out what to do. I don’t want to give up so easily. But not only am I having difficulty figuring out how to wear my hair, also stressing about which products to use to tame my hair. In the past week alone, I wasted so much time doing research at sites like Nappturality and Motowngrl, it’s not even funny. I suppose I just need to give it time. I really want this to work.

17 Comments
  1. I’ve been natural for just under ten years now (with a brief fall and ill-advised fall of the wagon about 8 years ago). I’ve had corn-rows, twists, a baldie and now locks. I know for a certainty that I will never ever chemically straighten or curl my hair again. And it’s not necessarily a political thing, it’s just that the longer you stick with it, the more comfortable you get with it and the less you want to go back to the relaxer, perm or pressing comb.
    Why don’t you try some twists? I think twists are lovely and since you hair is long enough, you can arrange them into all sorts of stylish rolls and buns and chignons. And with some practice you can do a pretty decent job of twisting your own hair (it can take a lot of time though).
    Whatever you come up with, stick with it. And, to use an old cliche, be happy to be nappy!

  2. Growing out your hair is never easy. Neither is changing hair styles. You get used to looking in the mirror and seeing “you.” And when you look in the mirror and don’t see “you” it can get uncomfortable.
    Give it some time to get used to seeing “that crazy woman” in the mirror. You might find you like looking crazy! ;-]
    And, if it makes you feel any better (since we gay guys know all about fashion, right? LOL) I think you look better with some height around your face.
    Good luck!

  3. Ursula sis, I am right ther with you! I am having a hard time myself STILL adjusting to wearing my natural hair sans extensions and it will be a year in July! Don’t give up — maybe we can be a support system for each other! My hair journal is at http://www.serenitee.com/hairstory/
    There you can read about my trials and tribulations with the fro. Just know you are not alone!

  4. Ursula you are a blessed woman! I am looking at your picture. You have all that wonderful thick hair. I am 49 and wear locs and I love them. They are extensions, though no one can tell, but I can. I wish that I had the lovely hair that you have. Get your hair locked I know you will love it. I call having my locs as growing old gracefully! Good luck sister. I know things will turn out ok.

  5. HELP!!!!! I was wearing my hair cut very short but 3 months ago I decided to stop cutting it becasue my dream is to wear 2 strand twists. I got comb twists several weeks ago but they itched non-stop plus it cost $65!!! So anyway from the NET I see that I need for my hair to be about 3 inches long for twists and as of right now I have about1 1/2 inch. Any suggestions about what I can do next so I don’t get frustrated and cut my hair? Thanking you in advance for your help, Jane

  6. I HAVE TRIED TO GO NATURAL TWICE. HOWEVER, I ALWAYS GO BACK TO CHEMICALS. MY PROBLES IS THAT I HAVE NO DESIRE TO WEAR LOCKS.I’M VERY VERSITILE WITH STYLING MY HAIR. SOMETIMES I LIKE IT STRAIGHT(OR PRESSED) AND SOMETIMES I LIKE TO WEAR BRAIDS. ANY SUGGESTIONS?

  7. First of All. I have never let anyone do my hair but a profession.
    However, my locs were started two small. I have had as many as 5 joined
    together but my locs are still to small. The weight of the joined locs
    are causing the hair from the root to become very fragile. I have had
    at least two or three locs to snap off. What can I do to save my locs
    without having to get my hair cut and start over from the beginning.
    I am very frustrated because I let professionals do my hair and I am
    having this problem. I pay big money to get my hair done. I have been
    locing for almost 2 years and my locs are on my shoulder but are very
    thin. PLEASE HELP ME!!!

  8. I suggest you visit http://www.nappturality.com There are many natural women there who post pictures of their hair, their style, the routines they use to maintain their hair. It’s been a wonderful place full of information. I visit there every day on my journey through natural hair care. The people are supportive. Visit!!
    peace n blessings

  9. I HAVE BEEN NATURAL FOR 5 YEARS NOW. I HAD DREADS FOR 5 YEARS, BUT I JUST TOOK MY LOCKS OUT AND NOW I HAVE A LOT OF NATURAL HAIR. I CURRENTLY HAVE BRAIDS, BUT I CAN’T WAIT UNTIL I TAKE THEM OUT SO I CAN DO ALL OF THESE WONDERFUL THINGS WITH MY NATURAL HAIR. I DON’T THINK I WILL EVER GET A PERM AGAIN, BUT I WILL DEFINITELY LOCK UP AGAIN.

  10. I’m 16 years old and i’ve never had a perm and have no desire to get one. In a day and age were I see that blacks have lost there sence of idenity, I love my natural hair. It gives me the pride of saying and feeling that i’m a blach girl and i’m proud too. I’ve been teased practicall all my life for not perming my hair. so my question is why is that the woman with natural hair is “not as pretty”as the one with the processed straight hair?

  11. I am eighteen years old I see black women all the time who have used chemicals in their hair, and now can barely form a ponytail with that thin straight mass! Wear it narutal, or use braids, cornrows, of have your own style. It hurts my heart to see our women trying to live up to the “white” version of pretty and fail miserably. I have a perm, but have not used chemicals for a few months and I will never go back to them either. I wish I would have discovered myself

  12. I am 25 still feel and look like I am a teenager. I feel that most black women are trying to live up to live in this white society. When I was younger I didn’t have a perm. My hair was long and beautiful. But I begged my mom to get a perm and just recently I relized that my hair is very short. Not even at my shoulders. I haven’t gotten a perm since October and I am frustrated with my hair. But I won’t give up. I love the fact that my hair is growing and can’t wait until it grows longer than my shoulders. I am so excited. I wanted to get locks but I think locks are nasty looking. My friend has some and hers is pretty, but that is only one person’s Dreads that I like.

  13. Locks can be very beautiful as long as you maintain them properly. No beeswax, shea butter, etc. as it doesn’t wash out well and will leave your locks hard . The first thing to realize is that not everyone’s hair can support an afro. By that I mean be thick enough to maintain the look regardless of wind. Even if it can stand up to wind, an afro is still likely to get mushed, etc. from coming in contact with head rests, etc. I recommend finding a good NATURAL hair care specialist (not a chemical stylist who also does natural hair). Natural hair varies and what works for one person may not work for you. If you are still struggling and want more info (and if anyone is still reading this site), please send me an email and I’ll share all the info I’ve gotten after being natural for 6 years.

  14. Natural hair rocks

  15. Hello everyone!!! I am writing becuase I am about to grow my hair out natural and really don’t know what to expect. I have had a perm for about 9 years now and I am 20. My hair used to be about 3 inches above my butt until I was suggessted to get my ends clipped. Every since then my hair has been a little above the middle of my back. I miss my natural hair because it was thicker and longer. I really would like to go back but I need advice can someone help a sista out?

  16. I love my hair and I finally got it to grow out and have been doing it for 3 years. I was thinking of perming but since I read these comments I don’t think I will anytime soon.

  17. Do anyone know if you need a cosmotology licence to specialize in natural hair care? or do you need trainning only?

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